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Small Town Shaadi Tale About Average Joe (And Jane) 
That’s Too Long And Too Average.

Rating: Two Surprises Many Groans

Mini Review:

When I was happily surprised, people around me asked, ‘You didn’t see the trailer? It’s in there!’ Am glad I hadn’t seen. Because the film has gin-ke two twists. And the rest is ghastly predictable. If you can get over the Bundelkhandi (or is it Malwi) Hindi spoken, you will fall in love with the heroine’s spunky Mausi and the hero’s Bhai, and it will be on Netflix soon. 

Main Review: 

I love and respect Nawazuddin Siddiqui as an actor but his Puspinder’s sex face was hard to handle. And they show it not once but at least four times. 

So he’s a Dubai returned Pushpinder Tyagi (pronounced, ‘pus-pinder’) , thirty six year old (way past ‘marriageable’ according to family) who seems to want to desperately get married. The colloquial term they use again and again, ‘Naada dheela’ is so ghastly you puke into your popcorn. Is that why he looks so uncomfortable in the role? How often through the film I wished he’d turn into Faizal Khan of Wasseypur and get us all out of this small town misery. 

His family is what most supposed small town families are meant to be: A managing mom, uncle and aunt, a bhabi (her husband is in Muscat), a younger brother (a wonderful actor, not credited on IMDB) and a sister who is still doing her BA (six years and counting). Plus a grandmother who wears the post-cataract sunglasses. There is also an annoying kid called Ikka (obviously the bhabi’s kid)

They stay next door to Ani or Ankita (Athiya Shetty, in a surprisingly good fit) who dreams of upping her friends and posting her ‘foreign life’ photos on facebook, and will reject any ‘rishta’ with anyone who won’t take her abroad.

Her family has an unmarried mausi, Karuna Pandey in a brilliant, brilliant role, a dad and mum (both very Hindi TV serial parents). They are all totally involved in trying to get Ani married off. 

See you are already tired. So were we. Watching these people interact really is tiresome. Because the ‘shaadi karaa do’ thing is so passe you groan into your coffee. You have seen Puspinder’s sex fantasy (a girl’s hair moves off and you see his sex face) and you puked into your popcorn, so you cannot eat that any more. 

The winner in the movie are clearly the jalebis and kachoris and cashews which everyone in the family keeps consuming through the film. And yes, Pani Puris. 

You want to forget the awful pani puri flirtation like, ‘Bhaiyya give her sweet pani because she’s so hot’ and her saying, ‘Bhaiyya, give him sour pani because he’s sweet!’

Ugh! Ugh! Ugh!

The fun happens (yes, the first plot twist) when both show up married. After all the mausi has said, ‘You are not getting anyone who will take you to London-Amrica, so Dubai hee sahi, And the lad is decent.’

The post marriage thing could have been interesting, but everyone in the audience has guessed already that he’s lost his job abroad… More tedious events later (like she can’t do it with him because there isn’t ‘love’) he just leaves after showing up (second plot twist) from under razais. 

And you just wait for the last supposed to be comic event – that looks like terrible homage to Anees Bazmi – the run around the home to end, and it finally does. Everyone cries and hugs one another. 

You groan. Then you remember Puspinder’s sex face and you run out of the theater. 

P.S. Whoever chose the sweaters for the cast should get a super pat on the back!

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