Review: PHAMOUS

Written by  on June 1, 2018 
PHUCK-ALL


1 star


Mini Review:


This movie about guns and baddies is so slow you could
answer all your pending emails and the story would not have
moved an inch. A local politician and a local baddie rule a
small town with guns. The politician lusts after the wife of a
local chap. The machinations to kidnap her are so pathetic
and the posturing with guns is so ridiculous, you want to fast
forward the whole thing and be done with lust and guns
and whatever…


Main Review:


When you think about why someone needed to tell this story,
you come up with no answers. The story is so sketchy,
everything looks so stretched you wish you had a remote
control to fast forward the whole thing.


The movie begins ordinarily enough. The setting is Chambal,
the dreaded dacoit infested region. They say the waters of
the Chambal river turn anyone into a ‘dhaakad’ or ‘a heavy’.
A girl is getting married when dacoits show up to loot the
wedding. But wait! The dacoit is actually kidnapping the bride.
He’s Kadak Singh (played by Kay Kay Menon, wearing a large
handlebar moustache and yellow contact lenses). The bride’s
dad Shambhu, is none other than Jackie Shroff, who uses his
own gun to stop the looting and kills his daughter instead.
The cops show up and arrest Jackie Shroff (who looks the part
of a guy who could handle a gun, is taken away). Since
Shambhu is gone, Kadak Singh and his bad political crony
Ram Vijay Tripathi (played rather hammily by the hitherto infallible
Pankaj Tripathi) take over the area and become petty dictators.

Kadak Singh’s atrocities are witnessed by a young lad called
Radhe, who unwittingly saves Kadak Singh by refusing to identify
him as the killer in a police lineup…Then there’s Radhe’s
heartbreak over a teacher Miss Rosy (Mahie Gill who is predict-
ably clad in barely there blouses) who is raped and killed by the
sleazy Ram Vijay Tripathi, who then goes to jail. Radhe grows up
to be a namby-pamby Jimmy Sheirgill who marries Lalli (Shriya
Saran, who is dressed up too scantily to be village belle) who in
turn is ogled at and is wanted by the sleazy politician… So
Kadak Singh and Ram Vijay Tripathi hatch a convoluted plan
to first give Radhe a job, send him to do accounts in nearby
villages and then to make merry with Lalli. That takes at least
45 minutes to accomplish. You wonder why they don’t just
shoot Radhe and get on with the lust program? Then you
realise you don’t really care.



(this review appears on nowrunning dot com)

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